Thursday, February 20, 2014

I Need Some Pussy {riot}

You girls can drink this.

I'll pass out after a few of these.

Then, in the morning, we can buy cigs at BP, go from #40 to #30, and cause big trouble.

No Cossack will pull your hair, but I might pull out my Face Book friend's with my teeth. No soldier, you cannot have her name. Start searching with your Pentygone computer.

"Mister Hughes, could you specify what hair to which you refer?"
"Why certainly. Given I am a horny heterosexual, I was happy to..." 

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Austin's Costin'

Driver's License = $
MO Teacher Plates = $$
AAA Insurance = $$$
Fine GM vehicle not more than $2,000
Sleeping Bag = $$$$
Panasonic AG-AC130A = $4,130
Switcher/Mixer = $10,ooo
A wireless thingy, extra mike, condoms, tripod for a machine gun (or the camera)...

Can't go after a physical disability.
So politically incorrect!
However, who signed the ADA, and have you been in the Union Station LA Men's Room lately? The ladies said, "It's hellish in there."

My toys can drain the battery.
Then, they'd have to push him, and...
Dirty tricks? Me?

My new political consultancy? (GEWYWE)
"Got 'Em Where You Want 'Em," LLC

I'll accept no work unless you are "liberal" and down by at least 10 points. [The redder the state the better]

Sun Belt Democrats and hopelessly behind Green Party candidates are encouraged to fork-over your cash.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Can't Keep Up

Let's see. It looks like the RCA 1 pictured above, and...

NEW HOBBY: Refurbishing old television cameras and gutting items that look like one. 

NEW JOB: A political consultancy where I don't show up until you are good & behind and the election looms. Sagely advice? "You look like crap. My Hollywood makeup artist is on the plane." "You call that a nice suit? I got a platinum card that says otherwise." "Lose that redneck accent, and you might not lose on Tuesday." etc. etc. etc. Oh, that's right, I used to be a mental health authority. How about this? "You need some ECT like Tom Eagleton. I got a man at Barnes. It won't hurt your poll numbers. You're a sensitive gal now, not all broken down, crying, and pol sci psycho. Doc McCoy will fix it."

ON THE SERIOUS SIDE: The PSA possibly CIA killer parachuted out of the Cessna and it's on the video I saw this morning? Holy cow! Bumpy up there, sweetie? Belted-in for the First Officer's mass murder-suicide? Hughes just isn't wrong. Yes, I'm related to Howard, and I'll take the train, thank you.

Monday, February 17, 2014

Current River Ass~e.t.~s

How about I pay some select Boston bums to open accounts and hang around the Credit Suisse "soup kitchen." Get out? "We have funds on deposit and smell just fine, officer."

THE hughes $$$ ROUNDUP:

Central Intelligence Bank

Food Stamp About to S.N.A.P. Card

PAC Contributions

*Selling off of food stamp card value is punishable by Family Dollar crack whores at the door wanting more, cops demanding I.D. cards, and potential clever alteration of NegroBus passes to show the correct COLOR in order to travel east to Pops//Oz, get drunk, look for HizHonor Officer's Uzis, bribe the Cahokia cops, then once in a Chicago mafia the first Cubs v. Cardinal game is on...

Brief Phone Card Report
"Is Caroline in? Did she apologize for the nukings? Not yet? Dolphins? What's wrong with John Kerry?"

Saturday, February 15, 2014

"Call the cops"



Thursday, February 13, 2014

Even the Boss Has to Pay His Bill

Movie recommendation for the St. Louis cops:
Sandra, don't tell me they don't get it, or I may have to use a choice derogatory term from the anti war days my new GF Davis is old enough to remember. She is that old! Angry? Why? Damn women! The Birth Certificate says what it says, girls.

WHAT DOES HE MEAN? WHAT DOES HE MEAN? WE ARE MERELY DUMB COPS. HOW MANY COPS DOES IT TAKE FOR hughes TO BUY NEW ONE DOLLAR HEADPHONES? Four (4). "Did you see that video on DHS taking over the world? Better get to Wal Mart before it snows and buy more rations for the bomb shelter." What did he say?

Monday, February 10, 2014

Dirty, Dirty, Dirty

The most incompetent administration since your president grabbed his dueling pistol. Why not crank up stock movie mafia bad guy's about to do something music? Like what?

The Hughes Con~gressional Prayer Breakfast

5:45 AM 2/10/2014

RAYTHEON missiles to Saudi?
Apache helicopters to Iraq?
Both mine!!!
John Kerry needs his ass kicked. 
Big prick.

His face is in the dictionary by the word. 

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Got $49

A Russian spy and child enjoy the Omaha Zoo. Tell me [Hughes] I'm wrong.
(Don't blame goo~gle, it was Bing who blocked the upload)
Let's hear a patriotic song!!

Fantasy Green Room Speech
"Mister president, is it okay to have sex with a Secret Service girl?"
"You haven't nailed one yet? What's wrong with you?"

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Bill's Dead, Beth

Mr. Hughes spent a great deal of time deciding where and when to buy a pack of cigarettes on February 1, 2014. Why? I don't feel safe in my St. Louis neighborhood where many are unable to go outdoors without a black hood that obscures their face. Therefore, this narrative is dedicated to my sister, Mary Elizabeth.

These were my thoughts. Reading my mind?

"Oh great, it's getting icy. I'll fall on my butt. Oops. Looks like a roust. Cop said, 'What's going on?' It can't be good with a big black guy and a lawn chair out on the porch. It's sleeting, and you're out on the stoop selling drugs? Copper's trying to tell me something. Why? Why is Robin closed? Why do these people even post store hours? Damn, I'll have to go to the Bosnian store. It's open! Yea! [Post Edgefield 100's purchase]. Do not fall on your ass. Sir, keep moving! Drive-by time...keep moving! Jesus Christ, this neighborhood sucks. Buddy, keep moving!! There's the firehouse, for a guy with no phone. Dr. Pepper machine, eh? Oh, there's the TV on. They always leave someone behind. So many safety things I was taught as a kid. Like, where's the phone? Knock on the firehouse door. They'll help. Almost home. Let's get all Secret Service. I need a gun. Okay...we got a hoodie at the bus stop. And, why are you stopping? Two cars in the street facing the same direction? Don't like it. Something's being exchanged. Oh no, you are doing what? Right in front of me?" 


Beth, your brother is dead. Why? The "hoodie" your brother missed, who was dressed all in black, of course, was high on crack, psychotic, and though I am a "narc." He fired his gun, I was shot three times, went down, and died in the northbound lane of Michigan Avenue trying to call 911 on the stupid-ass Trac Fone. The fine citizens of your Carondolet neighborhood ignored my dead body until some guy like your husband said, "Shit, there's a guy down." The cops arrived twenty minutes after the shooting. The ambulance? A half-hour. The paramedic said? "This guy's dead." It was your brother, Howard Hughes Junior's grandson.