Thursday, July 18, 2013

Aimee's Microphone Joke

"We" have an untenable situation at UNION STATION IN LOS ANGELES. Every word I say is true, and I do not live in the streets of Los Angeles. DO NOT ask me for anything, or you are talking to two Los Angeles County Deputies, and I will request your immediate arrest.

You have a right to be in Starbucks, as do I. You are not related to Howard Hughes, and I am quite sure you are not interested in transporting me to the relevant Probate Court in Clayton, Missouri, but someone will indeed help with that--eventually.

You see, I am homeless and slowly starving to death. It's not the first time in California--an alleged state not part of the USA as I understand your country. I'm from England. Say "great" 3x I believe, and that's my grandpa who lost a war in North America because they basically said, "Screw it, lot's going on in Europe," and withdrew. George III was not mentally ill. He had a brain disease that was "physical" in nature, and they never relieved him of command. For one thing, they could't accomplish that, as you could not "impeach" a King, and the fellow had his lucid days, I've read.

How many Royals have you bumped into, Mr. Sociopath? I wondered about that, along with the entertainers. Politicians? Not today. I'm mentally ill? Here is another free story. The National Guard F-15A had long ago rattled my coffee shop window, and there I sat, writing Ask Not.  

A woman came in the door. I am a heterosexual guy, so I noticed her. She sat near the door drinking tea, I believe. Side profile said, "Aimee Mann is in Kaldi's." I thought, "Maybe she has a show at the Pagent." THE BIPOLAR AFFECTIVE DISORDER GUY--ON OR OFF MEDS--WOULD PESTER HER, BECAUSE I HAVE, OR HAD, MAFIA, ALMOST ALL OF HER SOUND RECORDINGS. I did not do the "big fan" routine. It is called "respect," and you California heathens just don't get it.

Same night, a spy associate borrowed a pen. Problem? She's supposed to be 40 years old and borrowed the pen dressed in the same clothes and hat as when she was 19. At first, I thought hologram, but how could a hologram take the pen and even remember to give it back. Thanks, writers like it when you return the pen. Yes, it took my CA debacle to find evil shits have been copying more than Dolly the Sheep. That, and 50 more cents will get me a Starbucks refill.

My spy pal? Not real. Aimee? Real, and sitting by the door as my "lookout." Gonna murder both of us? Not that night. When she got up to leave, in Missouri-ese I thought, "Hot damn! That's really her." Why? Sorry I now know, and nothing will ever again make me happy. You've done what you've done to me, and you can't take it back. May I serve as a wretched, Nixon-like, first elected President of the European Union? Thanks!

Joke? "Running for president on the wrong continent? Only Hughes does that." And Aimee's microphone joke is? The Voices Carry video I never saw until today, due to no cable TV and working my ass off, has her singing into the U.S. President's microphone since the Nixon Admiinistration. As an old soundman, I got the joke.

CLICK-CLICK.....On Jay Lono's show singing into our FBC AKG's? We need to talk, even if married to a perfectly nice guitar player.

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