"This committee will come to order for the first reading of the, uh, the 'Eric Clapton's Cocaine Shall Never Be Played on U.S. Airwaves Again Act of 2018'. This is one of the president's, uh, pet projects, shall we say? We'll have order here!"
I am not an "EAGLE." I am not an "OX." I am human. JOHN "fucking" KERRY, who stopped his bus and stared at me, how about the whole CABINET resign, and leave Barack & Joe to talk it over with the Pentagon? This is common in my European Union. May I "run away" with someone I like as a human? Oh, no! We are "androids" and "robots," and what did I call it long ago? A "neurologically modified humanoid."
Shit hitting the fan?
It stinks, NOT ME.
Jim Kerry can't get his sequel made, because I spoke to him?
Barack "scumbag" Obama has got what going on?
It's "HUAC with no hearing."
Don't deny it, BLUM.
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At 8:08 p.m. p.d.t <soldiers, as I've stated repeatedly, I just look at the damn clock> I feel compelled to add some more "FACTS and INNUENDO"
FACT: The only ball to ever leave the park? How many innings played? How many batters, las vegas oddsmakers?--Las Vegas? Future home of Muslim prayer towers, after I get to Houston. By the way son, Ronald Reagan was from California, not Texas. I'm sure of it. Tom who? Tell me I did not shake hands with Howie H.! Magic! [but not] BH & BB are not credible, ca Kenny? Ask U-man; he was there, too. Lern was in a crib! Get your mind out of the gutter, John. Mike Shannon? Who? He has A1 Steak Sauce, girls.
INNUENDO: I saw Joe in on U.S. 101 with palm trees & shit on that insurance commercial during the NH Primary and I thought, "Nah, it's not like that out there. I'll find me a hot Chinese girlfriend and..." Not quite, Bill. 2016? Surely Tony A. will rent the whole house. No? We'll make him "An offer he can't refuse," right Governor Lynch? Right-O!
NOTE TO NASA: As the likely late Ron Bradshaw--a speedfreak I.H.O.P. cook--said to my late business partner, "You sure work in a fucking mess."
CITIZENS OF THOUSAND OAKS--WESTLAKE VILLAGE>>>PLEASE DECREASE YOUR STUPID DRAMA>>>Yes, my computer has been "exposed" as the same one in the Bill Clinton video, but no one is getting killed. That said, you might consider putting your ass in "rehab," or finding someplace else to park your ugly face, because, as usual, and as soon to be conscripted coffee/tea-drinking pal Aimee Mann sang, I have "No choice in the matter."